If Two Trains…

Graph from GraphJam

When I was young and confronted with this question (teachers have learned to stop calling on me when I raise my hand) I asked if the trains were on the same track.

“Well, if they are,” I said, “we shouldn’t be wasting time calculating this. We should be stopping the damn trains.”

We are raising a nation of children who, when confronted with an imminent train wreck and the wholesale slaughter of innocent passengers, instead of sorting out methods to relay the problem to the engineers, simply spend time calculating the when-and-where of impact, and how bad it will be.

Which explains reality television, if you think about it.

Star Wars, Retold…

… by someone who hasn’t seen it.

Hilarity.

The Difference Between Reply and Reply All

Names removed to protect the innocent. And the guilty.

From: John
Sent: Friday, January 02, 2009 10:30 AM
To: Company
Subject: Did you lose some money?

I found some money on the floor… come by and let me know how much you lost…

________________________________________

From: Jeff
Sent: Monday, January 05, 2009 10:59 AM
To: John, Company
Subject: RE: Did you lose some money?

I lost a bunch in my 401(k) in 2008…

Another Office Convo

Internet is down at home. I’ll be a little while in posting my logs from Poland. In the meanwhile…

Coworker: [picks up keyboard and shakes it violently]

Me: o.O

Coworker: It wasn’t listening to me.

Me: Hm. Well. In my limited experience with technology, I’ve found shaking it rarely works in your favor.

Coworker: That’s just what I do, with things that don’t listen to me. I give it a good shake.

He shakes the keyboard again, demonstratively.

Me: Ever heard of Shaken Baby Syndrome?

Coworker: No.

Me: You will.

… Fatalists?

The title is a Men in Tights reference.

In AW I made a very solid post I wanted to save here. You know. For posterity.

We were discussing propensities for discovering slash in any subtext findable, and Lord of the Rings came up in this context (and yes I mentioned pointy hat trick). I mentioned recalling Sam actually outright declaring love for Frodo. (Yes, yes, love between men doesn’t have to be gay, I understand.)

The Post:

HAH found it.

Then as he had kept watch Sam had noticed that at times a light seemed to be shining faintly within; but now the light was even clearer and stronger. Frodo’s face was peaceful, the marks of fear and care had left it; but it looked old, old and beautiful, as if the chiselling of the shaping yeas was now revealed in many fine lines that had before been hidden, though the identity of the face was not changed. Not that Sam Gamgee put it that way to himself. He shook his head, as if finding words useless, and murmured: ‘I love him. He’s like that, and sometimes it shines through, somehow. But I love him, whether or no.’

Here’s how I imagine a conversation about that going…

Tolkein: So..?

Lewis: So.

Tolkein: What did you think?

Lewis: Um. Friend. I’m… not sure if you’re aware… but are… are they..? You know…

Tolkein: Not sure I follow.

Lewis: [waves a hand] You know.

Tolkein: Oh. Oh! No. No no no.

Lewis: It, er, it comes out that way. A bit. In the text.

Tolkein: I see. [scans text] Now… which part exactly?

Lewis: I’d have to say it’s somewhere between Sam watching Frodo as he sleeps and saying that he loves him aloud. I don’t know. Somewhere in there.

Tolkein: Huh. You think if I make an offhand mention of Rosie in the final part, it’ll balance that out?

Lewis: … It… it might?

The Great Divide Within My Office

Here is a sterling example of how little I know of finance:

Office Mate: Woah.

ME: What’s up?

OM: The market. By 900 points. And nobody knows why.

ME: I told it to.

OM: Usually with this kind of fluctuation, people know why.

ME: I saw the market, and it was sucking, and I said, “Hey, market. Smarten the fuck up.” And lo.

OM:Must be some sort of insider information.

ME: Well, maybe The Daily Show will tell you why?

OM: I hope so. I hope I don’t have to watch Kramer.

ME: … Is he the guy they had in Iron Man?

Get Out The Vote

Hitler Banned

Link

An oldie but a goodie.

Twilight I’d Totally See

Link. Shamelessly stolen from SBTB.

This is a movie I’d see. Hells yes.

Brought to you by a dempsey who is still at work.

World of Wifecraft

I know many who would chuckle at this video.

Not sure how many visit this page though.

But you can’t buy Thunderfury.